It's a kind of sweet sadness

Oh, you guys. The summer's almost over. I hate when summer's over. Last week I was kind of looking forward to school, and seeing you guys every day, well, except Laura and Lekey :'(

But now I'm realizing how much I'll miss doing nothing all day, and sleeping forever, and staying up late drawing and reading, oh I'll miss all of it. The cicadas want me to stay free with them forever but I can't do it.

I want to lay under the stars and recognize the Dolphin and the Swan and Draco and the Eagle like we did in Quebec. I want to jump in Woodward Reservoir and explore little stores like I did in Vermont. I want to dance by the Pacific Ocean and watch rocks float like I did in Oregon. I want to hear people sleep-talk like I did in North Carolina. And I want to stay up late being crazy with my friends like I did in Kentucky.

But I think this year will be a good year. I have a feeling about it. January 1 is not when my new year starts, no, it's August 11. And I want to be different. I don't want to retreat into my hair when things go wrong, I want to fix them. I don't want to move through school in my own entranced mind, I want to be present. And I don't want to let any of you get away from me like you did last year.

I am wildly tired right now, so I'll conclude.

Be with me, be in the moment, be human, be kind.

I love you.