Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Lunch line complications...
Long story short, some words were exchanged in the lunch line that shouldn't have be exchanged at all.
Hannah, I am sorry I said that, though it was really unfair that I was in line longer, and I didn't even try to touch you, yet you tried to pull me out of the line by the strap on my bag. It seemed that you didn't even care I was in line longer.
Yes this whole thing is childish itself, but people just don't cut people and pull them out of line when they're cut for getting cut.
The line would be less complicated and less crowded if people actually started out in the back of the line and not on the SIDE!
Hannah, I am sorry I said that, though it was really unfair that I was in line longer, and I didn't even try to touch you, yet you tried to pull me out of the line by the strap on my bag. It seemed that you didn't even care I was in line longer.
Yes this whole thing is childish itself, but people just don't cut people and pull them out of line when they're cut for getting cut.
The line would be less complicated and less crowded if people actually started out in the back of the line and not on the SIDE!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
if home is where the heart is
Then we're all just f*cked.
Things are going nowhere for me. Well, maybe they are, but it's down. And this time I know it's not PMS. You've seen me. You know what I'm talking about.
I know I'm distant, I know I'm not the talking type. But you know, maybe if you tried talking to me, I'd talk! It's not like I'm just going to go up to you and start telling you my problems. If you're worried, talk to me. And don't be discouraged if I don't respond at first. I'm so used to hiding that it takes time for me to come out of my shell. But I need you guys more than ever. I don't know what's happening to me, I don't know how it's going to end. I just know it has to end sometime.
Help me.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Okay....
Not to worry. I am completely fine now. Another year of preparation won't be bad in comparison to gymnastics (which took 3 years to get back too). So now I have something to focus on.
I am considering going to Regional to support my team and see people and meet new people. It'll be fun!
I am considering going to Regional to support my team and see people and meet new people. It'll be fun!
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Feelings at the moment...
I'm better than I was, but I'm still a bit down.
I knew it would take a miracle to place on that Science test, so I'm not down about that as much.
I feel like I didn't do enough. I took one test....the same thing as last year, but the feeling's different. One person had to drop out of Social Studies and I wanted to do something, so I took their spot. For that, I felt like I contributed. This year I did the same thing. Took one test, and that's it, but the feeling's not the same.
It feels like I shouldn't be the one congratulated. I know what you're going to say. "You're still part of the winning team." Yeah I am, but there's that individual aspect of achievement that I felt I didn't get while mostly everybody else did. I knew I was not going to place in Science, but I still should've done Quick Recall. I've done better this year in practice and I know I would've helped this time, but apparently I'm not "strong" enough to do that. If there were 8 people allowed to do Quick Recall, I would've been that 8th person. I really feel like I was that close, but it seems it's me that I'm always left out. Yeah I won first at the JV Challenge and this has been my best year since 7th grade, but I want to be able to keep going through the year, not go to the first meet and be done. That's how it's always been and I wanted it to stop, but apparently the gods of the academic team world think I shouldn't keep going. Now I'm going to wait an entire year while you all go to Regional. Good luck. Make it to State! I'll be in Gatlinburg that weekend (of State) with the cheerleaders at Nationals.
I knew it would take a miracle to place on that Science test, so I'm not down about that as much.
I feel like I didn't do enough. I took one test....the same thing as last year, but the feeling's different. One person had to drop out of Social Studies and I wanted to do something, so I took their spot. For that, I felt like I contributed. This year I did the same thing. Took one test, and that's it, but the feeling's not the same.
It feels like I shouldn't be the one congratulated. I know what you're going to say. "You're still part of the winning team." Yeah I am, but there's that individual aspect of achievement that I felt I didn't get while mostly everybody else did. I knew I was not going to place in Science, but I still should've done Quick Recall. I've done better this year in practice and I know I would've helped this time, but apparently I'm not "strong" enough to do that. If there were 8 people allowed to do Quick Recall, I would've been that 8th person. I really feel like I was that close, but it seems it's me that I'm always left out. Yeah I won first at the JV Challenge and this has been my best year since 7th grade, but I want to be able to keep going through the year, not go to the first meet and be done. That's how it's always been and I wanted it to stop, but apparently the gods of the academic team world think I shouldn't keep going. Now I'm going to wait an entire year while you all go to Regional. Good luck. Make it to State! I'll be in Gatlinburg that weekend (of State) with the cheerleaders at Nationals.
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